On Branding

I try not to make a habit of writing journals unless I have something to say that isn't so open-ended and all over the place like this, but here goes;

Fresh out of art school, I'm starting to pick up on the kind of brand I've made for myself, and it's one of... poor quality, unrepresentative of what I actually want to be doing with my training. All the kinds of things that I want to do, that I want to be paid to draw, I've realised, I haven't built my portfolio around. I built my portfolio around (mostly?) all-ages, cartoony, really 'stock' sort of characters and designs. I'm actually really saddened by my lack of going near anything I really, really enjoy in other mediums and styles.

I've been caught in this vortex of "what will sell at (anime) conventions" lately, because bills need paying, but that's a really short-term game plan - it sents up entirely the wrong image. Jack of all trades is master of none, they say, and there are plenty of people out there that do what I'm producing right now, and better. There's a niche that is distinctly me, and I haven't been showing it off, so to be frustrated that no-one is picking up on it is stupid of me. There's still a great divide between what I am now and how I present myself, and what I want to be and what I want to be paid to draw.

How do other artists get over the inhibition of drawing something that isn't beyond PG-13? I really adore the philosophy of be the perfect bait, but I find it difficult to work towards that, keeping in mind that the kind of projects I want to get from clients might deter the patronage of others. That's partially why my website is a pun (tarawristart = "terrorist art") because it's the sense of humor I'm drawn to and want to draw people to, but I haven't done it any justice. This is a really hard concept that I'm still having trouble wrapping my mind around, let alone having the answer to quite yet, even though I'm sure it's the 'just be yourself' after school special blather that it usually is.

Having that much pride in your work, and knowledge of yourself, to create something personal and put it out there as representational of yourself is difficult. Especially since the more you identify with your work, the harder it becomes to deal with the critics trying to tear you down; often the critique becomes personal, declaring whole genres as invalid drivel, when it is a subjective matter of taste. I must state, however, so I'm not misunderstood, that the objective critique of work is never cause for alarm; only gratitude.

I've gotten into debates over the validity of terrible things, and I champion them, because I enjoy them. I can see why some of them might be considered objectively bad, but that's no reason why they can't still be enjoyed, and to have been created for simply the purpose of enjoyment. I'm not talking about problematic things; that's another rant entirely that others have covered, how if you're a fan of problematic things then to at least recognize why they're problematic as you love them anyway. But I digress. I'm talking about really cheesy shit, things created just to be fun, and not make any sort of point.

I've found that recognizing that something is terrible, but finding it fun and wanting to be a part of it anyways, rustles some people's jimmies. I must say, the world would be a more boring place in the name of Good Taste if every critic had their way.

tl;dr whine whine I haven't been drawing what I want to draw even though I can totally just... do that, at any time , no-one is stopping me whine whine moan bitch whine so I'm going to do that now

This is essentially a resolution to draw more blood, gore, raunchier crap, fanart, etc; because I like it, combined with a disclaimer that it will probably be subjectively terrible, but intentionally so, this time.

Enjoy!